


The party at which multiple people realize certain things about themselves

by backgroundgay



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AND GAY, Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Awkward Flirting, Birthday Fluff, F/F, Fluff, Gay Panic, Humanstuck, Internalized Homophobia, Its Hell, M/M, Mutual Pining, Party Games, Past Jake English/Dirk Strider, Pesterlog(s) (Homestuck), Self-Esteem Issues, Texting, be proud of me, can you tell i hate jane, i wrote this because i learned how to write pesterlogs, theyre all dumb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:07:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23816629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/backgroundgay/pseuds/backgroundgay
Summary: Roxy plans Johns 20th birthday party, excited to get her friends together for some fun games.She does not expect multiple gay awakenings. In hindsight, she probably should've seen it coming.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, John Egbert/Dirk Strider, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Comments: 9
Kudos: 40





	1. the one where roxy tries her best

**Author's Note:**

> a few things.  
> 1\. Roxy types like that because she has autocorrect turned off and types really fast, not because of any drinking. (also some inside jokes like "wonk" and "omeg")  
> 2\. The first chapter is all pesterlogs because it looked cool and i got carried away, but future chapters will be actual writing, with logs peppered in because it looks fucking cool.  
> 3\. mature for swearing but there may be some smut in the end, who knows.  
> $. jane sucks and i almost didn't put her into the story.  
> thanks for reading!! leave a comment :)

\- - tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering STOP CHANGING THE GROUP NAME TO GAYS AND OTHERS at 6:32 - -

TG: so 4 the partaaaay tomorrrow is it like dress casially or go all out??? 

TG: casually* 

TG: roxy you are literally the one who is planning this shit

TG: if anyone on this goddamn earth is going to know the dress code for johns birthday bash itll be you

EB: dave don’t be mean!! she was probably asking for our opinions.

TG: should you even be in this groupchat

TG: i mean youre the man of the hour we cant hardly plan your birthday while you listen

TG: thats like the groom seeing the bride in her dress before the wedding

TG: ruins the surprise and also i think its bad luck

TG: i wonder if its the same for gay weddings does one groom take on the not being seen duty or like

TG: neither

TT: I don’t think we should impose heternormative rituals onto gay weddings. I think it would be neither, unless the two grooms or brides discuss it beforehand.

TG: OMG!!! shush up about gay weddings!!

TG: we arr talkin about what to wear 4 johns partu!!

TG: *partY 

EB: i think that it probably doesn’t matter.

TG: GASP!!!!!!

TG: how DARE you!

TG: dude

EB: what! i just think everyone should wear what they want.

TT: John, at this point you should know that there must always be a dress code for these parties.

GG: john dont you remember what happened last time there was no dress code!!

TG: whatEVER!! The dress code is now “casual but at least ONE thign that is blue becuz its johns bday”

GG: thats pretty specific! but it sounds fun, so i vote yes!!

TG: im glad u agree bcuz it was not up to vote

EB: okay that actually sounds pretty cool.

TG: that is why i am the BEST at planin parties *wonk*

TG: you did this just to spite me didnt you

TG: you know damn well i dont own anything blue

TT: Dave if you need I can ask Kanaya to pull something together for you, I’m sure she would be happy to do it.

TG: uh

TG: sure

TG: she better not put me into something stupid

TT: No worries, it won’t be too silly.

TG: i hope you realize how unhelpful and ominous that sounded

TG: and if you even think of putting me in something stupid i will just not go 

TG: you wouldnt do that to john would you

TT: I specifically mentioned Kanaya so you wouldn’t assume the worst, what about her makes you think she would even let me ruin her reputation by implying something stupid you wear was her idea?

TG: that reminds me r any of you bringing an DATE? *second wonk of the evenign*

TT: Yes, Kanaya. I’ll tell her about the dress code.

TG: not a date

TG: but yeah i invited a friend

GG: ooooh do we know this person!

TG: i think you mightve had a class with him last semester

TG: i mean it goes without saying hes just a friend

TG: what kind of first date is a friends birthday party

TG: even if i was remotely interested in dating a dude it would be all sorts of lame

TG: no offence party planner and birthday boy

EB: none taken! whats his name?

TG: personalally i think a bd party planned by ROXY is a perfect first date, so a little taken

TG: but i forgive u

TG: anyways

TG: his names karkat

GG: UGH!!!

GG: dave i love you but did you have to become friends with literally the most annoying person on this earth!!

EB: i had a class with him too! he wasn’t so bad, but about halfway through the semester we had this really weird conversation and then he started avoiding me.

TG: cmon jade isnt that a bit of a stretch

TG: hes a little shouty but he isnt so bad

TG: plus hes going to johns party so youll have to get used to him

GG: fine!! but you better not fall in love with him, i can only deal with his voice for so long.

TG: i mean no problem there im not gay

TG: so yeah not gonna happen

TG: and his voice isnt that bad he just isnt good at controlling his volume

TG: probably comes from being ignored all the time i mean people just hate him all the time unfairly

TG: if you get to know him im sure youll like him

TG: hes actually a pretty funny guy

TG: if you get him to laugh hard enough he starts snorting

TG: and hes weirdly into romance movies

TG: like its kind of interesting hearing him rant about love interests and shit

TG: ive been talking about this dude for an awkward amount of time

TG: fuck

TG: sorry

TT: May I offer a suggestion.

TG: no you may the fuck not

TG: fuck it im going to bed

EB: dave it's only like 6:50?

TG: gotta get my rest for tomorrow

TG: peace

\- - turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering STOP CHANGING THE GROUP NAME TO GAYS AND OTHERS at 6:47 - - 

GG: :O

GG: i hope i didnt upset him by saying karkat was annoying :(

TT: I highly doubt that was his issue. He’ll be fine, most likely.

TG: identitty crisis aside, is any1 else bringin someone special perhaps???

GG: nope!

EB: the other people in this group havent been very active lately, hopefully they answer!

TG: im doNE here ill go bother those LOSERS!! in our groupchapt 

TG: bye bye gays and others

EB: theres only one homosexual in the group active right now.

TG: *suspsipious*

TT: No comment.

\- - tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering STOP CHANGING THE GROUP NAME TO GAYS AND OTHERS at 6:49 - -

\- - tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering DOUBLE CHEEKED UP ON A THURSDAY AFTERNOON at 6:49 - -

TG: omeg ur all fake 4 ignoring my qs in gays & others!

TT: Oh my even god.

TT: Oh my entire god.

TT: No I got this, oh my electric god.

GT: Try oh my electric gosh!

TT: You’re right the e was a distraction, I should’ve been looking at the g this whole time.

TG: OMEG!!

GG: Sorry Roxy, I’ve been busy. What did you ask in the other group?

TG: i just inforned them that the dress code is “casual with somethin blue” for eggbert

TG: alSO was wonderin if any of u fools r bringing a guest ;))))

TT: You did this just to spite me didn’t you.

TT: I don’t own anything blue.

TG: LOOOL!! you and dave r birds of a feathwr

TG: *feather

TT: Besides, blue doesn’t match my aesthetic.

TG: im sure youll look all sorts of sexyyy in blue for all the hot studs attendin *wonk wonk*

TT: What “hot studs” are you talking about.

TT: The only guys going are my little brother, straight, or my ex.

TG: actually 4 ur information, dave invited another dude!! You dont know if hes straighjt

TT: Oh, god. I’m not going to sleep with any of Daves friends.

TT: Actually why am I even invited? I barely know Egbert, shouldn’t it be a friends only situation?

TG: ud know him bettr if you bothered TO BE ACTIVE IN THE GROUPCHAT!!!

TT: Sorry if I’m not super interested in being active in a group with a bunch of kids.

GG: They’re barely younger than us, only three years! Plus, John is turning 20!!

GT: I am *so* proud of my little cousin!

GT: I remember back when i myself first turned 20, what an interesting stage in my life! The adventures i went on!

TG: “interestin” “adventures”

TT: ...

GT: That is not what i was referring to!

TG: lets move on b4 dork has a crisis, not a single 1 of u answered my guest question

TT: I was not about to have a crisis, for your information.

TT: The dot dot dot was just so you’d know I was still here, but had nothing to say.

TT: It’s been a long time. Have more faith in me.

TT: Also, no I’m not bringing anyone.

TT: I didn’t spontaneously make any more friends.

GG: Not with that attitude!

GG: I did not invite any guests, Roxy.

GT: I think youll find that come party day my side will be sadly devoid of any sort of guest. 

TG: thats alll u had to say :)

TT: So there’s zero chance of me being allowed to not go right.

TG: duh!!!!!

TT: Right, just making sure.

TT: What are we even going to be doing?

TG: i have all sorts of fun party games planned!!

TG: now that we have a group and not four lame ppl we can do all sorts of sterotypical games!

TG: *stereotypical


	2. the one where john ogles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the guests arrive with varying success on time management.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its three am, enjoy.
> 
> pls comment :')

Roxy is the first to arrive at Johns apartment, naturally. She’s so early in fact that John jumps out of bed at her loud knocking and scrambles to open the door, still in his boxers and an old sweater. He waves at her, still not awake enough to form coherent thoughts let alone speak. Roxy lets herself in, and John notices that her “something blue” is in fact a long blue scarf that nearly touches the floor behind her as she walks in.

“I brought some things for our kickass party,” she says, shaking a bag she's holding. John nods dumbly and retreats to his room to grab his abandoned glasses. He shoves them on his face and goes back to see that she’s placing a few things on his coffee table. He sees an empty bottle and decides not to ask.

He wipes the tiredness from his eyes, “you’re here so early, when does my party even start?” he’s hoping the answer is in a few hours, so he has time to shower and make it so his hair doesn’t look like it has its very own tornado. 

“Well it officially starts at three, but I told the Striders two thirty so when they arrive “fashionably late” they’ll be perfectly on time,” Roxy answers, giggling to herself. John also chuckles, and then he yawns and stretches his arms above his head, hearing his elbow pop. gross.

“That gives me enough time to get ready, why are you here like three hours early?” John asks, wondering if it’s rude to shower while he has a guest over. It’s not if they’re friends right? She came over way too early anyways so it’s not his fault. It’s probably fine.

“Because! I have to get everything perfect or else everyone will think that I suck at party plannin, when it’s the opposite!” Roxy declares, waving her hand at John as if he should’ve known this already. John nods again.

“I’m gonna get ready,” he says, scratching the back of his head, “uhh, I guess I’ll leave you to it?”

Roxy nods and waves at him again, this time clearly saying “I don’t care what you do”. John walks back into his room to grab his clothes for the day, he’ll have to get dressed in the bathroom because there's no way he’s risking anyone seeing him naked, especially not Roxy who has no shame and would probably tell everyone. 

He showers as fast as he can, and once he blow dries his hair as best he can his stomach growls and he decides it’s breakfast time. While he was showering, Roxy set up a bunch of decorations, some happy birthday signs and balloons at the ceiling. The balloons are mostly blue, with a few yellow and white ones scattered in. John does not want to know how she filled them with helium, with no obvious tank anywhere. 

Roxy is humming to herself and John quickly makes himself a sandwich, not the most obvious breakfast food but it's good for now. 

“How many people are coming? And how many of them are staying the night?” John asks, as Roxy places a few wrapped presents on the floor in the corner. 

“Uhhh, counting me there’s nine people coming. I guess it depends on them for whos sleeping here, but I doubt you have room for ten people. Unless we stack ‘em? I’m okay with getting my cuddle on!” Roxy says, giving John a thumbs up. John nods and then walks over to drop himself onto the couch.

“What's the plan?” he asks, finishing his sandwich off.

“Buncha games, and then when it gets dark we have a Nicolas Cage marathon cause you’re in love with him,” Roxy says, sitting down next to him. John scoffs.

“I’m not in love with him! I just have an immaculate taste in movies!” He defends himself, but it never works, he's doomed to be known as the guy who’s in love with Nic Cage forever, “how did you get the rest to agree to that? I know for a fact that Dave wouldn’t watch Nic Cage all night if he could help it.”

“I have one solid trick for gettin those guys to watch something they don’t like,” Roxy leans forward like she's about to tell him a secret, “don’t tell them about it!”

The two of them laugh, “Besides, it's your bd so they have no choice!” that’s probably not true, but John isn’t going to complain. 

\---

They waste a few hours after Roxy finishes getting everything ready (really she had no reason to arrive so soon,) until the first guests arrive. 

John opens the door to Dave and Karkat. He laughs at the fact that they are the first ones to arrive. Dave is wearing a nice blue button up, tucked into black jeans, and Karkat has a big light blue sweater on. 

“Sorry we’re late,” Dave says as the two of them walk in. He quirks an eyebrow and looks around at the lack of people, “or not?”

John watches with amusement, and then glances at Karkat who has his hands stuffed into his pockets and looks like he’d rather be literally anywhere else, “Hey Karkat! We shared a class right?” John says, walking up to the short guy. Karkat cringes to himself and looks at the floor for a second before answering, and John knows why. He still isn’t sure what he ever did to make Karkat not want to talk to him anymore, but he’s hoping they can get past it for this party.

“Yeah,” is all he says, glancing towards Dave. John internally sighs, so maybe it won’t be that easy to rekindle whatever friendship they almost had.

“So I’m guessing Rox got the time wrong?” Dave says, sliding up next to Karkat, presumably to save him from the conversation.

John laughs, “yeah she did that on purpose since you never arrive on time.”

“Figures, but what if we had arrived on time for the fake time she set? What if you weren’t set up and we had to see the hideous state of your unorganized apartment and it shamed you so much that you had to cancel the party for everyone else? Living the rest of your life in your room from shame doesn’t seem like the life you had planned,” Dave says, and John rolls his eyes, but he can’t help but smile.

“That's a weird way of saying happy birthday, and besides you’ve already seen my place in its worst state so if I haven’t already died from shame I doubt it’ll happen anytime soon,” John glances at Karkat with a “can you believe this guy?” look but Karkat is looking at Dave. 

Dave shrugs and lifts his arm for a fistbump, “happy 20th, glad you finally made it,” he says, and John accepts the fistbump. Apparently this alerts Karkat what they’re doing here in the first place because he looks up to John again.

“Happy birthday! I uh, got you this gift but I barely know you so it might not be your taste?” he says, lifting up the book he’s holding that has a blue stick-on ribbon stuck to the cover. John smiles, maybe there is hope for this friendship after all.

“Thanks! I’m sure I’ll like it,” he responds, taking the book. He isn’t sure what to do with it, should he go put it in the small pile of presents or somewhere else? He already knows what it is since it’s not wrapped, but he doesn’t want to just carelessly put it on the coffee table and somehow imply that he doesn’t think it's a good gift. 

He decides to put it with the gifts as someone throws the door open, not bothering to knock. Jade comes inside, followed by Jake. Jade has a long sky blue skirt, and Jake has a dark blue short sleeved button up over top of his favourite shirt. Jade goes over and hugs John, followed by Jake who pats his back.

“Happy birthday old chap, let’s have a great party!” Jake says, giving John some finger guns. John smiles at his cousins, and Jade finally frees him from the hug.

“Happy birthday!!” she says, voice high from excitement, “I can’t believe you’re turning 20! It feels like just yesterday we were celebrating your 13th birthday!” 

John scrunches up his nose, “Don’t remind me of that disastrous party,” he laughs, and Jade grins.

“That's why we always have dress codes!” she sin-songs, and John has to admit she’s right. 

The two of them leave to interact with the others and John stands by the door, waiting for the rest of the crew to show up. Jane arrives next, holding the cake she baked for the occasion and also a suspiciously large container that smells like cookies, even though she promised no cookies. Jane also usually wears blue so her style is unchanged. After that it’s Rose and Kanaya, wearing matching impressive blue dresses. Their arms are interlocked and they both wish John a happy birthday. 

Its twenty minutes later when Roxy sighs harshly and pulls out her phone, “I swear that lousy antisocial-” John doesn’t hear the rest as Roxy mumbles to herself.

\- - tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 3:32 - -

TG: u better not be thinking of skipping!!

TG: i will hunt you down strider!!1

TT: Relax, I’m on my way.

TG: U BETTER BE!

\- - tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT] at 3:33 - -

Dirk arrives a couple minutes after that and John answers the door. He’s surprised at Dirks outfit, he definitely feels a little underdressed even though it’s his own party. Dirk has a black button up, underneath a navy blue vest, and John spends probably a second too long looking at Dirk's forearms. He hasn’t spent a lot of time with the guy but he doesn’t remember him being so jacked? Dirk clears his throat a bit awkwardly and John jumps slightly, quickly stepping to the side to let Dirk in. 

“I can’t believe I gave you a fake time so you wouldn’t be late and you still managed to be late!” Roxy scolds and Dirk shrugs.

“This is a lesson, don’t give fake times and maybe I’ll actually show up on time,” Dirk responds, and John walks away from the conversation, a little embarrassed that he had been caught ogling. Was it ogling if it was two guys? John was just feeling a bit inferior. Sure he isn’t a beanpole like he used to be, but he certainly won’t be winning any arm wrestles. He walks over to where Dave and Karkat are in what seems to be an argument and plops himself down on the couch next to Dave. Dave spares him a glance and then crosses his arms.

“John you’ve known me for how long right?” Dave isn’t expecting an answer so John doesn’t speak, “how many times have you seen me stutter?”

John raises an eyebrow, that’s what they’re fighting about? “Not once,” it’s true, as far as he knows Dave has never stuttered in his presence.

“Case and point. I’ve basically known Egbert since the beginning of time, and he wouldn’t lie for my benefit,” Dave says, smirking at his clearly winning case.

“Bullshit!” ah, there's the volume problem Dave mentioned, “you stutter all the time you lying bastard! I know for a fact you stuttered when introducing yourself, _D-Dave_!” Karkat mocks a stutter and Dave scoffs. John wonders what that’s about, what could have made Dave lose his cool like that even for a second? John has only seen him be “uncool” a few times since they became friends, and it’s not easy. 

Dave’s comment that Karkat should get his ears checked is drowned out by Roxy loudly clapping to get everyone’s attention. She’s standing in front of the TV so everyone can easily see her, “Alright! Since everyone is _finally_ here,” she glances pointedly at Dirk who shrugs, “we can get started on party games!! I’ve prepared a buncha them, fun games that every party legally has to include!”

John highly doubts that, “We’ll start with the most famous party game of all, truth or dare!” Roxy claps again, drowning out a few unhappy groans. Roxy plops down onto the floor on the opposite side of the coffee table than the couch. Jade and Jane join her. John stays where he is, next to Dave on the couch, Karkat is a bit squished between Dave and Rose, who has Kanaya on her other side. The couch was not made for five adults.

Dirk hesitantly sits on the floor on the end of the coffee table, and Jake sits on the opposite end. 

“We’re gonna spin this bottle to see who goes first!” Roxy grabs the empty bottle she brought and spins it. So that’s what it was for! John is satisfied to know the answer, obviously the bottle is for deciding who goes first in these games and nothing else. 

John watches the bottle spin with interest, he hasn’t played truth or dare in years, but he remembers the harmless fun he used to have. What could go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if theyre all heavily out of character, this is my first time writing for a lot of them and they're pretty hard to get right. also, its hard writing about such a big group of people.
> 
> (its hard writing about such a big group of people and no one understands)


End file.
